Seeing Clearly in VanCity

Being more present is something we can all work on. Being present helps us to embrace and encourages us to enjoy moments and situations. I have always had a harder time being present and not over thinking situations, I blame this on my current occupation as a life coach and always having to plan for every possible situation and outcome, but over the last year I have learned how to be more present by meditating and participating in yoga. In the first two days during my trip to Vancouver last week I really learned exactly what being present was, when I was hit with the hard truth of what it can look like and feel like when one becomes not present in the moment.

A lot of people go into any situation having certain expectations whether they be good or bad, these expectations usually come from past experiences, the ego, or future thinking.  Having these expectations can really hinder ones ability to enjoy what is truly in front of them and make them miss more than they could have ever thought. For me going to Vancouver I had a lot I was focusing on; finding a place to live, figuring the city out more, relaxing/time away from work, meeting old/new friends, and of course spending time with my much missed boyfriend. I had so many expectations (good and bad), should's, should not's, and a huge to-do list before I even got on to the plane to go to the coast and I did not even realize it. I had no idea that everything that I was thinking and focusing on was hindering my ability to just enjoy every moment and experience thing's fully.

The first time I was hit with needing to let go of all my to-do list, thoughts and expectations was as I was flying over the rocky mountains on my way to Vancouver, and it literally was rammed into my head. I had received guidance from within several times that this trip was going to be a big thing for me and was really going to open some things up, but I never got clear guidance on what it was going to open up for me, naturally my mind started to wonder and my ego set in. As I was looking out the plane window and down at the Rockies all I could think about was all the things I was going to do; run everyday, tons of yoga, all the special things with my love, and of course my huge to-do list! As I was looking out the plane window thinking of all these things I began starring blankly and was not realizing what was all around me, then BAM(!), I was literally hit in the head with the truth. I had hit my head off the side of the window. As I rubbed my head I began to think about closing the window to prevent this from happening again, until I heard loud and clearly "open your eyes and take in the landscape that is before you, be in the moment, not the past or future", just as I heard this the clouds parted from under the plane and all I could see was the most majestic mountains, with an amazing view of a valley and a huge body of water, I was flying over beautiful Kelowna BC. Had I not listened and looked down I would have not been able to just embrace the moment and be in the beauty that was before me of the majestic mountains, ice blue water and vibrant valleys. Had I not listened I would have just closed my window and starred blankly ahead while thinking more about all the stuff I had to do and should do when I landed.

The second and third realizations happened after my flight had landed in Vancouver and were a little less painful. When I first got off my flight I expected to just feel like my life had suddenly changed and that there would be no stress (as I was away from work, insert happy dance here) and it was all just a big huge relief and I was instantly going to have the time of my life. When I did actually land and got through my gate all I realized was that I was in an airport and it all felt the same, no sudden sense of relief, no happy dance, no glorious sudden overwhelming joy, I was just in an airport standing. As I stood trying to figure out where I was going to collect my baggage and meet my boyfriend, whom was coming to pick me up, I started to feel anxious, then I began panicking because I SHOULD not feel this way, then it all got super weird from there for me. As I was walking to go and collect my baggage I stopped at a bathroom took a look in the mirror and realized I did not look like myself, I did not know what was going on, I expected that I should feel like I was on top of the world right now, what was going on...seriously. I continued walking and arrived at my baggage claim. As I stood there figuring out which one I had to go to I started panicking more as I realized I did not see my boyfriend anywhere! I looked around franticly thinking he had forgot me or maybe I was not really in Vancouver, I expected him to be here waiting, I expected so many things...like a happy dance at my terminal. All of a sudden a loud blooming voice told me "look straight ahead and to your left", I did just this and noticed a man in a suit looking around, he looked my way and I realized it was my boyfriend, he was looking for me and being that I was short he just could not see me right away, the voice then went on to say "let go of how you think things should be, they are the way they are and if you look at them clearly they are wonderous, you just have to let them be". I pushed the last part that I heard aside while I embraced with my love, collected my baggage and then drove off in his car. As we drove I began looking around and thinking about my to-do list and want list, everything I was seeing was like I was seeing it through someone else's eyes, like I was detached but I continued on.

 Laying on the couch the next day cuddling with my boyfriend, thinking about how I should be running even though it was raining outside, I began to feel anxious again, why oh why was this happening again?! After a few minutes I got up and went to his room where I just sat there, where was this anxiety coming from, why was this happening, it was not supposed to be like this! I just sat there, then after a short while I got up and grabbed my note pad in my suitcase, I turned to my Vancouver to-do and want to do list, that was it I burst into tears. This was when my ego stepped in "why did you even come, you should not have come, you are never going to get all of that done, the things you need to do aren't even possible" so on and so forth. I just cried and cried, hoping my boyfriend didn't come in and start asking why. Then the words came again, but this time even louder and with more force, "let go of how you think things should be, they are the way they are and if you look at them clearly they are wondrous, you just have to let them be"...my guidance continued "once you let go of your expectations and start living in the moment you can truly start seeing it for what it is, every moment of everyday is wondrous and full of love but when we focus on should's, would's and other expectations past and present we take away the wonders that are in front of us and we do not recognize the miracles and miraculous things happening at that time, feel the moment, be present, and let go of any expectations you have." I was stunned. I was not living in the moment, I was letting my expectations get in the way of embracing what was right in front of me. I was in an amazing city and my opportunities where endless if I just became present in every moment. It was then and there I made a commitment to myself to do just this. In that moment I grew in the sense that I understood more what living in the moment was and being present in the moment was. In that moment I was able to release my expectations for the trip, myself, my to-do list, and my must/want list. It was then I started to actually experience the trip itself for all that it truly was.

Often we let expectations, to-do lists, and should's get in our way of experiencing what is right in front of us. When we start being present in the moment we start truly living life, because we start fully experiencing it, we are no longer detached and worrying about getting thing's done or what we should be doing next. I know that sometimes we need to get certain things done and such, but do not think about them until it comes time to do them.  Thinking about the past and future only holds you back from seeing the beauty in the world that is in front of you. Becoming present, just doing what feels right at a given moment, and living life without expectations helps us to open up our heart to so many wondrous experiences that we would otherwise miss, this is truly the greatest gift ever. I still have to remind myself to let go of anything that is not in the present moment every once and a while but when I do I always see things much more clearly and lovingly. I challenge you to be more present in your life; let go of worry/fear of the future, expectations about any given situation, and any biases that you have about situations that come from your past. Give yourself the gift of seeing more clearly and experiencing more joy in your life, just be present!

The Greatest Tool to Changing Your Life

While my world gets busier and crazier I am often reminded of how thankful I am for the quite moments and the moments of silence I get. Meditation has been a huge life saver in my life for many reasons and in many ways. To be completely honest with all of you, until I found meditation I do not think I was truly accepting and okay with myself. My meditation practice is what has got me through some of the biggest ups and down's in my life and it has continued to be the one thing that I know I can count on every day. Meditation for me is a must, it is something I would not, and could not live without. It has so many health benefits to it and it has helped so many people take control and change their lives around. Exploring the world of meditation for many can be intimidating and very scary; some do not know where to start, some do not know how they could do it, and some just do not even understand or really know about the concept. Because meditation has become such a big part of my life and has helped me in so many ways it has become my personal goal to help others understand and realize the potential of this amazing tool, and this is exactly what I am going to do by giving you; simple meditations, helpful hints, and reasons why it is so grand!

Meditation is an amazing tool that can help in so many areas, actually thousand's of area's, in your life. Meditation has the power to take your life and change it in to something that you never even believed it could become but only if you let it! Here are some areas and things that meditation can help you with in your life:

~Improved concentration: when you exercise your mind by meditation it activates your minds ability to concentrate on one thing at a time, this is a really good thing for everyone but is especially good for those with ADHD, ADD, those who feel like their mind is constantly on the go, and people who have constant mind chatter.
~lowers stress and anxiety levels! The slow breathing and concentration that meditation takes helps the brain to focus on something else and not magnify or focus on the things that cause stress or anxiety. Also meditation has been known to release serotonin and dopamine into the blood system, which we all know are feel good, blissed out hormones!
~Helps us to focus on the here and now instead of past and future. Do not get me wrong there are times where we need to think ahead or remember things from our past but most of the time this does not serve us any good. While you are meditating you are bringing your focus into the here and now and forgetting about all the small details that do not matter to you other than what is happening at that moment. When we practice meditation and experince the here and now through meditation we are more able to bring this thinking into our everyday lives, this is oh so good in too many ways!
~Lowers blood pressure, helps the muscles and body to relax deeper (which can aid in helping with insomnia), helps aid in weight loss, increases stamina and vigor (this is why athletes are told to meditate)!
~Helps to increase confidence and better sex!!!! Both of these are due to the fact that your hormones regulate with a mediation practice and also you are more prone to in the moment thinking and positive thinking :) And really who would turn down the possibility of better sex!
~Increased spirituality!!! Meditation helps us to connect more deeply and purely with our true and higher selves which helps us to connect more into our version (which ever that might be) of spirituality.

There are tons of benefits and area's in life that can be helped by meditation, these are just a few, to check out more visit http://www.artofliving.org/benefits-meditation

When starting out meditating there are many ways that you can go about it but I recommend taking it slow and using guided meditations. Lots of people rush in to meditation thinking that it will be easy and they will just be able to do it, but truth be told meditation actually takes lots of energy and focus so sometimes it is not so easy. When you start out you may not meditate for more than 5 minutes and that’s okay, or you might not be able to completely calm your mind and body and that’s okay too. It is called meditation practice for a reason, you practice, it is like any activity, the more you do it and the more your body/mind gets used to it the easier it comes to you. The point is just to do it without expectations and see what magical things happen fro you. I still to this day do not set time lines around my meditations I just meditate until my body and mind no longer want to, some day’s it is 10 minutes and others it is 30 or more. When you meditate and come more in tune with your body, you body will let you know exactly what it needs and how much. I also recommend using guided meditations when you first start out, this is not a must I mean after all I did not do this when I started out, but guided meditations when you first start out can make it easier for you to focus, less scary, and they usually help to relax your mind and body more (sometimes silence makes us anxious and can be scary fro some). Anything from Gabrielle Bernstein or Deepak Chopra are my favorites!!! Doreen Virtue also has some great meditations but they are much more spiritual so if you do not want to go down that road just yet I would not recommend them.

Most morning's I start my day out with a meditation, after I have showered to wake myself up that is, and this has been an amazing way to start my day out I have realized, I also meditate during the evening as well but both meditations are very different from one another, yet similar. My morning meditations are usually my longest ones as my body and mind are still relaxed and usually are not completely "turned on". In the morning I sit cross legged with my hands face up on my legs in my meditation area, light some incense, and turn on some meditative music; I then close my eyes and take a few deep breathes and bring focus internally and begin to thank my guides, angles, etc for the day that I have before me and all the love and good things I will experience, I also ask and pray for those in the world experiencing hurt/pain/sickness to have love and healing light directed towards them, I then ask my guides to let me hear any guidance that I may need for the day clearly in my meditation and throughout my day, after this I bring my focus to my breath and go completely within for however long is needed. I can usually tell from my body when my meditation is over because I will just feel the sudden need to open my eyes, stand up, or move in some huge way. By starting out my day with this meditation I have noticed my mood through out my day is over all better as I am focusing on positive things before it even starts! My evening meditation's are very much the same as the morning minus the insence, music, I also usually do these in silence and thank my guides for the day that I had and list 5 things minimum that I am grateful for that happened. My evening meditations are usually done after a workout, run, or yoga class so that I can thank my body fro doing the activity and I always end them the same, I bring my hands into prayer at heart centre then I bring them to my third eye and say "may you think love", then to my throat chakra "may you speak love", and then back to my heart chakra with "may you be love". I do other forms of meditation but these are the two most common as I do both pretty much every day. There are many forms of meditation and almost anything can be meditative. For me when I am running in nature this is highly meditative, also when I am dancing I find the same stillness in my mind as I do when I am sitting cross legged meditating. If you can find stillness in your mind (without falling asleep) and relax your body then you can make anything meditation, focusing on your breathing also helps a ton! There are many people that meditate while cooking, cleaning, creating art, playing music, drumming, walking and so much more!

Meditation is a tool that has been given to each and every one of us and we all have the potential to change our lives with it, after all it could be the greatest tool given to us to do so. Meditation can change you physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. I encourage each and every one of you too try out this tool that has been given to you and see exactly how life changing and magical it truly can be. If you have any questions or would like to learn more about meditation, as I have only touched on a small amount here, please feel free to contact me. I hope you all see the love and light within yourselves and within others. Namaste.

Whoa, There Ya Are?!

My fur-buddy Vitton snoozing <3

I know I have been keeping you all in suspense for a while now as I have not been posting much, but for the last little bit I have been focusing on some big things that are happening in my life right now and trying to further a few others along the way. This has all been highly exciting and equally exhausting some days. But don't fret, I am going to give you bits and pieces but not all of it right now, just to keep you on edge :)

Thing's I am doing right now:

~Detoxing from processed and refined sugar!!! I am currently 2 weeks free from processed and refined sugar!!! This means I have not been consuming anything that has refined or processed sugar in it, noodles, cookies, muffins, bread, chips, etc.
~Healing my body; emotionally, physically, and spiritually. In the last month not only have I detoxed from sugar but I have also detoxed from all alcohol (I used to be a glass of wine a night girl) and all the detoxing has forced me too look at things in my life even more different that I did before....ch-ch-ch-changes
~Tons of detox baths...duh cause I am detoxing!!! Plus they are just totally awesome!!
~Participating in tons and tons of online seminar's and courses about nutrition and body balance.
~Looking at different schools in Vancouver and area...for what you will never know ;) okay you just will not find out quite yet!
~Focusing on my words...I know that this one sounds a little odd so I will try to explain it without giving away too much. I have been starting to notice that sometime's I do not communicate effectively, I know, I know everyone could use a tune up in this from time to time...but my communication problem is actually in the tone of my voice and the words that I choose to use, mostly out of habit. Some times I use very aggressive communication even though I am not wanting to come off that way, and it is mostly in the words that I am using, so my goal/focus right now is to speak with more intent instead of directness, as directness can often come off as being rude.
~Awakening, invoking, and cherishing my inner goddess...this has been a huge thing this week and so exhilarating!
~Raw-king new raw and vegan recipes!!!! Some have been a fail, some have been lick the bowl/plate delish and some have been nothing special but still dam good!

Well these are some of the things that I have been up to, plus work, plus yoga/running, plus mediating, and my social life...yepp busy busy so I have had a little less time than I would like to finish these epic post's I am working on. I would tell you everything but I do not want to give away too much of what I am doing and working on as they will be unveiled shortly. I am hoping to get a post I have been working on up by Tuesday so you can all learn about these new magical little adventures I've been having!

One last thing I'd like to talk about is something very important and major coming up. My big, HUGE, amazing move to beautiful Vancouver, BC!!! It was about a year ago when I made this huge decision, I am sure when I started talking about it people thought it would never happen but I knew deep in my heart it would. I put it out to the universe and slowly over the last year, with I must say little work on my end, things have alined and happened to point me more towards Vancouver and moving than I would have ever imagine!. BUT now with the moving being only next month and a trip to Vancouver coming next weekend (!!!) it is time for me to start pulling some weight and working more with the universe on this. So, I will apologize now, in advance,


if I do not post much over the next month, I have some posts that I am working on and will continue to do so and hopefully get up.

New Raw Yummy Recipe...Sugar Free!!

Anyways thats a little of what I have been up to and what I am working on at the moment. There is so much more to come your way, and mine as well, so until later keep beautiful, balanced, and your heart full of grace!!

Love, What Makes Our World Go Round

Love is a funny thing, you can be in love with someone, a thing, a place, yourself, anything really. We are all taught that we should choose love in all possible situations over any other feelings. We are taught  to love not judge, to love, not hate, to show love not anger, and so on and so forth. What we tend to forget is that what we ultimately need to do is love ourselves, know ourselves, and love the universe , so that that love can manifest and set forth into the world and come even more into our lives. After watching many people relationships end over the last 2 months and hearing them and others asking over and over again "what happened they loved each other?", "why would he stay with her when she cannot even trust that it will be okay" or "I do not understand why he would treat her like that?"  I began to take a deeper look into love and relationships in general and came up with what I believe makes relationships successful.

When I first started looking deeper into love and relationship's I took a look at my own; past and present. I looked at how successful, full of love, trust, and all those good things my current relationship is and compared it to ones in my past that had ended or that had not been so great. I looked at what had been different between all of them and thought long and hard about it. The one thing that was different was ME! I could not believe it, it was so simple, I was different. How might you ask? Well I will explain. See through out this journey I have learned, and still am learning, a few things I could not do or wouldn't do before hand; I learned to love and accept myself, I learned to be able to bask in silence, and I learned that no matter what everything will always be okay. Now let me explain what I mean by these and how they have impacted my relationships.

Until the past year I never realized just how much of an introvert I am, I for my entire life thought that I was an extrovert and could not understand why it was that when I was around people for a long period of time without a beak I would get irritated. Now I love to do a lot of solo activities and actually enjoy spending time by myself, or in silence with others. In fact this is one of the very first things my boyfriend told me he loved about me,he said he loved that I did not always need to be out and talking, that there was a comfort in my silence. Now I will be honest I used to be a chatty kathy but only because I was scared that if I did not talk it would get weird and awkward for everyone; and I also used to be the person that always had to be surrounded by people because the silence of being alone scared me. It was not until I got comfortable with just being in the moment and recognizing that silence was not scary at all that I over came both of these and started to learn who I truly am. Knowing myself better than ever has helped in so many ways, I look at the relationships that I used to have when I did not know myself well enough and I can se how it affected them. For example when I would fight or argue with someone it would end up being so heated even if it was something small, this was because at the time I did not realize that what I truly needed was to take 20 minutes to myself to process what was going on in silence, now that I know this I use this frequently. By being able to just be I have also learned that I do not need someone around all the time because being alone at times, minus when you have just watched a scary movie home alone in the dark, is not a scary thing. I look back to one particular relationship where we were together all the time and how horrible it ended up being because of this, I did not have my own relationships, interests or life and nor did he. Now in my current relationship I have a healthy balance of me time, our time, and our lives together and separate. It was me taking the time and challenge to learn about who I was that has made my relationships since successful.

The universe has always always always got our backs no matter what happens, and we just need to trust and believe in this. I know on a crappy day or when something bad happens it does not always seem like it but the universe will never let anything happen in our lives that does not teach us a lesson or help us to grow into a more fruitful life. I did not always have this out look on life; I used to be scared of a lot of things in life, I used to think that if something bad happened it was the end of the world, and I used to think that no one and I mean no one truly had my back. I am not going to lie sometimes at my worst moments these thoughts will creep in but I now know myself and the universe well enough to know that they are not true. Viewing my life through fear took a toll on my relationships, I viewed them as something to fix the things I was scared of, I would look to my partners to fix any and all problems and tell me it was going to be okay. By thinking this way I glorified my partners by thinking that they were the ones that could fix me and everything around me, this took all the power away from me and placed it in someone else's hands making them seem more capable or better than me. By changing my outlook to everything will be okay no matter what I took not only my power back, but also showed that I was responsible for myself and very capable at facing whatever life threw at me. All to often we look to others to fix our problems and to support us, this disempowers our inner self and even though we are not saying it intentionally we are telling our self "I cannot do this, I am incapable of doing it at all but someone else can do it for me because they are better than me". Now do not get me wrong it is okay to ask for help when you need it and it is nice to hear that "everything will be okay" and so on and so forth but we should not be dependant on these things from others to make ourselves feel like it will all work out. We all have all the tools in our back pockets to fix any problem that the universe throws at us, this is why the universe always has our back, and by asking someone else to step in and fix it you are doubting yourself and the universe's capabilities. And you do not need to think or believe that it is the universe that has your back, that is just how and what I believe, it could be God, Buddha, Ganesh, destiny, fate or whatever you believe in, just trust in something bigger.

Everyone has heard the saying "we accept the love we think we deserve", this is incredibly true and I never used to think so. I have had moments in my past that I have hated myself, loved myself, and half assed liked myself. When I look at the relationships that I had in any other time than when I fully loved myself I will be the first to admit they were crap! When you do not fully love and accept who you are you not only view yourself as a lesser person than what you are, but you also project that outwards which attracts people who will treat you the same. We cannot let something enter our life unless we accept it, and if we accept that it is okay to call ourself ugly, fat, worthless, dumb, etc then what makes it not okay for others to do the same. Now I will be the first to admit there are things about myself I would like to change but I have learned to accept them because without them I would not have all the things that I love about myself, and maybe one day the things I am not as fond of will change but if not I will love and accept myself anyway.

Learning to accept and love yourself is an amazing thing because then we are not looking to others to fulfill our needs, and we are already fulfilling them on our own then if someone does something for us that helps to meet our physical, spiritual, or emotional needs, that's awesome, but then if they do not then thats awesome too because the need was already met. But I guarantee you that if you start taking care of yourself, loving, and accepting yourself then you will see others step up to the plate as well. I recently watched a vlog from Gabrielle Bernstein where she explains that she wanted to feel more supported so what she initially did was start supporting herself more and in turn got more support, and its soo true; if you want something in your life start by loving/accepting and doing it yourself then this will project and you will attract it in to your life. Loving yourself and accepting who you are is the biggest make or brake in any relationship.

All too often we look to others to fulfill our needs, fix our problems and teach us about who we are. I often see so many couples who lose who they are as individuals and become just a couple that are so dependant on one another. I see girls who hate themselves, or half ass like themselves, and wonder why they are with a guy that treats them like they are dirt. I see relationships fail because one or both of the people do not know who they are, and are unwilling to learn by themselves about themselves. Last but not least, I see couple's and individuals that look to others to make themselves feel good about life instead of trusting the universe and the tools that we have to do so ourselves. I truly believe that the key to a successful relationship whether it be business, friendship, love, or family is to know yourself, trust in the universe that everything will always be okay no matter what, and love and accept yourself the way you are. Our inside world matches that of our outside world, be love and attract love.


If you would like to check out Gabby's vlog about how she got more support here is the link:
http://gabbyb.tv/vlogging/how-to-feel-more-supported